2026 Teaching

We want to discuss the compatibility checklist for marriage and whether physical factors matter in it.

First of all, let’s talk honestly about what people wonder about a lot. When you’re thinking about marriage, do physical things like being attracted to how someone looks, or feeling that spark, actually matter? Or is it all just about spiritual things and character as a Christian?

Do you know that the Bible gives us a balanced answer, which is yes.

Physical factors matter, just that they’re also not the most important things, and they’re not the only thing.

Let us now break it down simply with what scripture shows us. I love teaching with Bible references because, as a believer, the Bible is always our guideline and watchword 

Now let’s see

1. God made physical attraction a good thing; right from the beginning when God brought eve to Adam, Adam saw her and was excited:”this is now none of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (genesis 2:23)

2. But physical stuff is also not the no 1 thing we should look at because it won’t last forever

Prov 31:30 says charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the lord is to be praised

3. The heart of marriage is a promise, not perfect chemistry: marriage is a first covenant, a lifelong promise before God to love, serve and stay with each other no matter what.Malachi 2:14 God rejects the insincere worship of the Israelites because they acted treacherously against their wives, breaking the sacred marriage covenant

So after all this discussed what should our checklist look like?

1. Are they a true follower of Jesus? The Bible says that do not be unequally yoked with unbeliever, 2 Corinthians 6:14, shared faith is non-negotiable, you must believe in the same God, you must have same faith.

2. ⁠do they have Godly character? Kindness is very important in marriage, honesty, humility faithfulness (Prov 31, Ephesians 5).

3. ⁠is there physical attraction and chemistry? It’s also good and helpful, don’t ignore it or feel guilty about wanting it yes, but also don’t make it your number 1 priority

If there’s zero attraction and it feels forced, it’s okay to keep looking kindly and respectfully.

But if there’s some attraction and everything else lines up, don’t throw it away just because it’s not movie-level intense. Real love deepens attraction over years through respect, care and shared life together.

To conclude our teaching for the evening, physical factors matter because God made us body and soul. But they’re like icing on the cake and not the cake itself. The real foundation is Christ, commitment and character which is important. When those are solid, the physical side usually becomes sweeter and stronger with time.

May God help us all in Jesus name

Jesus Christ is referred to as the bridegroom of the church in several scriptures. In John 3:29, John the Baptist referred to Jesus as the bridegroom. What is the meaning of bridegroom? A man in the context of his own wedding, one who is going to marry or has just been married. We are His bride because he bought us with His precious blood. No bride price can be compared to this. His gift of salvation to us didn't come easily. It's sacrificial.  What he did for us is eternal. 

As a single trusting God for marriage, you must be married to Jesus for Him to give you His best. Even as a married man or woman, you must understand that it's only Jesus who can provide all that you need. Be it physical or emotional needs. Most people enter into marriage with high expectations of their partners. And if these expectations are not met, there will be serious problems. 

We must understand that man is limited, but Jesus is unlimited.  When we say man, we are talking about both genders according to scripture. Ephesians 5:25-32 When you have Jesus as your bridegroom, you can't be lacking love and care.  

As a man or woman looking up to Jesus for all your needs will save you from lots of troubles.. Jesus asked a profound question in Mathew 9:15, "can the friends of the bridegroom mourn while the bridegroom is with them?"  

Whatever pains or hurts you're passing through in your marriage can be taken care of by Him.

You just need to communicate with Him. As a single person, are you desperate to be married so you can be taken care of by your partner? 

Jesus can take care of you.

When you enter into marriage with the ideology of your partner meeting all your needs, you will be hurt and miserable because it's only Jesus who is capable of meeting all our needs. 

What is required of us as the bride  

1. Intimacy, not just activity - we need to have a personal walk with God first before working for Him. He desires an intimate relationship with us. Meeting Jesus means spending time with him in prayers, in the word and in obedience. James 4:8 

2. As a bride, you must be prepared - Staying faithful to Christ.  Revelation 19:7 

3. Have it in mind that the bridegroom is coming soon, John 14:2-3. As the bride, we are not waiting in fear, but in hope and expectation. 

4. Just like the bridegroom, we must adorn ourselves in righteousness. Isaiah 61:10 

Conclusion:

Brethren, to meet Jesus is to meet the one who loves us deeply, walks with us daily and is coming back for us soon. 

Today,  Jesus is calling us back to him, our first love, back to intimacy and readiness.  

Closing prayers 

Father, grant us the grace to remain and abide in you in Jesus name. 🙏

Help us. Lord, to be doers of your word and not hearers alone in Jesus name🙏

Let your word tonight bear fruit in our hearts in Jesus name🙏

Renew our love for you in Jesus name 🙏

Amen and Amen.

Our Anchor Scripture says

 “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.” 

Matthew 7:24 (NIV)

Please take a moment to reflect

By the end of this session, we hope that we would :

🙏Understand that marriage is built on Christ, not compatibility alone;

🙏Recognise that a godly marriage begins before marriage, with spiritual formation;

🙏Identify core foundations that sustain marriage in all seasons.

Marriage is one of God’s most sacred institutions; yet many people prepare for weddings, not for marriages. In our culture, we emphasise age, readiness, finances, and “God when?” but we often overlook the most important question:

Have you truly met Jesus as the foundation of your life?

The theme Meet Jesus reminds us that Christianity is not merely religious activity; it is a relationship. A godly marriage does not begin at the altar; it begins at the cross.

Marriage is not designed to fix broken people; it is meant to reflect Christ.

 “Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labour in vain.” — Psalm 127:1

Many relationships invite Jesus as a guest rather than establish Him as the foundation. A guest can be ignored; a foundation determines the structure.

A godly marriage is not built on:

🫶🏻Emotions alone;

🫶🏻Physical attraction;

🫶🏻Shared background;

🫶🏻Prayer points without obedience.

It is built on daily surrender to Christ.

For Singles

Who you are becoming spiritually will determine the quality of the marriage you enter.

 Do not look for a “godly spouse” while living an ungodly lifestyle. Marriage does not deepen spirituality; it reveals it.

For Married Couples

Christ must remain central after the wedding excitement fades. A marriage where both partners submit to Christ will survive seasons of lack, disagreement, infertility, distance, and growth.

In Genesis 1:27

 “So God created mankind in His own image…”

Before God instituted marriage in Genesis 2, He established identity in Genesis 1. Identity precedes union.

When people enter marriage without a solid sense of identity in Christ:

💞They seek validation from their spouse;

💞They fear abandonment excessively;

💞They tolerate abuse or control;

💞They struggle with boundaries.

A godly marriage is made up of two whole people, not two broken halves.

Ask yourself:

🙌🏻Who am I in Christ, apart from marriage?

🙌🏻Do I know my values, convictions, and limits?

🙌🏻Am I emotionally and spiritually mature enough to love without losing myself?

In  Ephesians 5:25

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.”

Biblical love is not primarily about feelings; it is about commitment, sacrifice, and responsibility.

Christ-like love includes:

🫶🏻Service, not superiority;

🫶🏻Respect, not control;

🙌🏻Communication, not silence;

🙌🏻Forgiveness, not score-keeping.

For wives and husbands alike, submission in marriage is first submission to Christ.

A godly marriage is not about who wins arguments, but who preserves unity without compromising truth.

“Can two walk together unless they are agreed?”  Amos 3:3

Spiritual alignment does not mean perfection; it means direction.

Godly marriages are sustained by:

🫶🏻Prayer together;

🫶🏻Studying God’s Word;

🫶🏻Shared values around faith, finances, family, and boundaries;

🫶🏻Accountability within the community of believers.

For singles, courtship is the season to observe character, not charisma. 

For married couples, it is never too late to rebuild spiritual intimacy.

Marriage is not the ultimate goal; Christ is. Whether single or married, the call is the same:

Meet Jesus deeply, daily, and personally.

A marriage built on Christ will stand storms, seasons, and silence. Without Him, even the most beautiful relationship will eventually crack.

Lord Jesus, we thank you for your divine revelation.

We invite You not as a visitor but as the foundation of our lives and relationships.

 Heal what is broken, align what is confused, and prepare us to reflect Your love in our marriages and future homes. 

Teach us to build wisely, in obedience and truth in Jesus Name. 

Amen.