2026 Teaching

Let us pray

Heavenly Father

King of Glory

We worship and adore You

We thank you for all You have done

Accept our thanks oh Lord in Jesus name

Amen

Tonight, Lord come and fellowship with us, we pray for the spirit of understanding in Jesus name

Amen

Today as earlier announced, we would be having a discussion centered on Handling Difficult In- laws

We have heard a lot of stories about this set of people, we have seen movies that have displayed what they are capable of doing and this has led to many women saying they don't want their husbands  mother alive or coming into the marriage with a defense mechanism

📯 The term difficult in-laws in this case refers to complex or very volatile relationships with in-laws 

You can identify them by their toxic behavior, overstepping boundaries, manipulation, guilt or by the way they undermine you, your family, and your  marriage the see finish syndrome

📯 From established facts about marriage we know when we fall in love and get married you have also partnered with their family as well 

These families have different background, expectations, personality, education and in some cases cultural belief which can cause tension and leads to misunderstanding

How do we navigate through :

📯 In some families, certain in-laws may unintentionally or deliberately create tension by spreading minor complaints or exaggerating issues. For example, there was a situation where an older sister repeatedly reported to their mother that her younger sister’s husband was “proud” because he did not call her regularly.

📯When the mother-in-law raised this concern, she framed it as a threat to family unity that he wants to scatter sisters love, even though the issue itself was relatively minor. However, such comments if left unaddressed can gradually escalate into significant conflict between spouses and extended family members.

📯 To manage the situation, the wife addressed her sister directly and firmly. She made it clear that constant reporting of trivial matters was unnecessary and unfair. She also pointed out that communication expectations should be mutual if her husband was expected to call, then the same standard should apply to her sister’s husband as well, and that was the last time she went about saying he doesn't call and all that again.

📯This response helped to highlight the imbalance and discouraged further unnecessary interference from her sister

❤️❤️So when we are talking about handling difficult inlaws 

The first and most important step in handling such situations is to establish clear and respectful boundaries. Not every issue requires escalation, and family members must understand the limits of their involvement in a marriage. Setting these boundaries early helps prevent minor concerns from developing into major conflicts and preserves harmony within the family.

Before removing stick from another's eye, first remove the one in your own eye.

Na so Bible talk am.

📯Let us consider a situation where a mother-in-law consistently insists on making major decisions for your household such as determining where you should live, choosing the schools your children attend, and influencing how you manage your home.

❤️How would you respond in this situation?

Option 1:

Address her directly and firmly, telling her that your home is your responsibility and that she should focus on decisions within her own household.

Option 2:

Handle the situation respectfully by allowing your spouse (her son or daughter) to communicate with her. They can acknowledge her concerns while making it clear that decisions regarding your home will be made jointly by you and your partner, based on what works best for your family.

The second option is generally more constructive and sustainable. In many family dynamics, communication is more effective when it comes from the biological child, as it reduces the likelihood of misunderstanding, defensiveness, or perceived disrespect.

By responding respectfully and setting clear boundaries through the appropriate channel, you preserve dignity, maintain family harmony, and still assert control over your home.

I recall my mother-in-law called me recently that we need to buy aso-ebi for a program I won't be attending, to make it worse she mentioned that she has collected the cloth for both of us, when I informed my husband he said I should tell her I am not interested because we have a lot of plans for the month, immediately I told him the talk sweet for your mouth please tell her yourself she will understand better as her precious son.

Healthy boundaries, when communicated with respect and unity, help prevent unnecessary conflict while reinforcing the independence of your family unit.

Prioritize your Marriage 

Matthew 19:5, it is written:

A man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

This Bible passage establishes a fundamental principle of marriage your spouse becomes your primary relationship. While parents must continue to be honored and respected, they are no longer the first point of decision-making.

It is important to understand that “leave” does not mean to abandon or neglect one’s parents. Rather, it signifies a shift in priorities from parental dependence to marital unity.

How does it sound in a marriage when one partner constantly says:

My mother said we should do it this way.

My father doesn't like beige curtains he prefers brown, let's use brown curtains 

Whatever my mother says is final, she knows what's best.

Statements like these can unintentionally undermine unity and create tension within the marriage.

📯Acknowledge parental input, but maintain boundaries:

Let your parents know that their advice is appreciated, but decisions will be made within your marriage.

Thirdly because of our time 

Speaking with wisdom

Proverbs 15:1

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger

Truthfully some will intentionally provoke so that they can use your word against you, you can imagine your husband's family saying to you that you did not patiently learn  how to cook from your mother or didn't your mother teach you how to cook

Honestly, I would love to respond with go and eat in your own house if you cannot critique nicely, 🫣🫣 

But

This response would only cause prolonged battle of the inlaws and may also affect the peace of the home

Not every insult needs instant correction, and wisdom or boldness is not saying what you have in your mind at that time, but in saying the right thing at the right time in the right way

Lastly pray, if you're still single pray for your inlaws instead of praying for your mother in-law to be dead add them to your prayers and if you're married while applying practical wisdom still pray

Prayer softens your heart and helps you see your in-laws with compassion rather than frustration...watch work and pray

And also let's keep in mind that we should treat our in-laws the way we would want to be treated when it gets to our turn

Shalom

Let us pray

Lord we thank you for tonight, thank you for your love father we ask oh Lord that you give us the wisdom to always control our emotions and radiate your love joy and understanding in handling families and inlaws in Jesus name

Amen

Good day everyone, my name is Abiodun Salami. I’m a firm believer that courtship, when done right, can set the foundation for a successful and fulfilling marriage. Today, I’ll be sharing key insights that can help you approach courtship intentionally and avoid common pitfalls.

MONTHLY THEME: COUPLES AND IN-LAWS

Topic: Things To Know During Courtship

Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it" is a verse from Psalm 127:1 (KJV)

Prayer:

Father!!! Please guide me/us in this journey, build me/us, establish me/us in your purpose in Jesus name. Let your glory come upon of me/us, give me/us a happy home to the glory of your name in Jesus name. Amen

1. How many of us has in-laws we relate with very well... As in like same family?

2. How many of us would have desired a better in-laws

3. How many of us has in-laws that you see often?

4. How many of us does not have in-laws? I mean parent in-laws, you don't have much to do with in-laws

INTRODUCTION:

They say "you do not just marry a person, you marry a family". The truth is, when you marry into a family, you have to deal with the customs, behaviors, and attitudes embedded in that family. Hence the need to know what you are entering into... Do not make same mistakes... someone here can relate

Courtship is viewed as a purposeful and intentional season where we evaluate  character (most important) and prepare for God ordained covenant marriage. The emphasis is on spiritual maturity and character, rather than just physical attraction or "casual dating. it is not a time we engage in sexual intimacy, because if we do... The real issue will or may not be addressed even when seen clearly.

Biblical Foundation

Courtship, from a Christian perspective, is rooted in God’s design for marriage.

‭Ruth 3:9-12 KJV‬

 9 And he said, Who art thou? And she answered, I am Ruth thine handmaid: spread therefore thy skirt over thine handmaid; for thou art a near kinsman.

10 And he said, Blessed be thou of the Lord, my daughter: for thou hast shewed more kindness in the latter end than at the beginning, inasmuch as thou followedst not young men, whether poor or rich.

11 And now, my daughter, fear not; I will do to thee all that thou requirest: for all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman.

12 And now it is true that I am thy near kinsman: howbeit there is a kinsman nearer than I.

In Ruth 3:9–12, the story of Ruth and Boaz presents a beautiful example of a virtuous, respectful, and intentional relationship—one guided by honor, clarity, and purpose.

Similarly, Genesis 2:18 (NIV) says:

“It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

This establishes that relationships are God-ordained and should be approached with wisdom and intentionality.

RELATIONSHIP CLASS: WHAT TO NOTE IN COURTSHIP

Lesson Objective

By the end of this class, participants should:

• Understand the difference between dating and courtship

• Know the purpose of courtship

• Learn key areas to evaluate before marriage

• Be equipped with practical questions for intentional relationships

1. Opening Scripture

Ruth 3:9–12

Shows a relationship built on honor, clarity, and intentionality.

Genesis 2:18 (NIV)

“It is not good for the man to be alone…”

→ Marriage is God’s idea, not man’s invention.

2. Introduction: Dating vs Courtship

👉 What do you understand by dating?

👉 What do you understand by courtship?

Dating

Dating is the romantic equivalent of a buffet, where you sample this, put it aside, sample another dish, and then that until you find exactly what you want. Na so so sampling... He/she may not tell, it is the truth

More harm comes to many of us through dating than in any other way. According to the world, dating is a way for singles to enjoy the comforts and pleasures of the opposite sex. Dating usually begins in the mid to late teens, whereas courtship begins at the time just prior to marriage. Dating is “having fun” with the op­posite sex with no strings attached

_Prayer:_

_May you not date when you ought to be courting and may you not court when you're suppose to be married in Jesus name. Amen_

Some people mistake dating for courting....

Let's see:

Attributes of dating

• Casual

• Fun-driven

• No serious commitment

3. What is Courtship?

Courtship is:

A deliberate relationship between a man and a woman to determine if it is God’s will for them to marry.

Explanation:

It is not for experimentation

It is for evaluation and decision-making

📌 Teaching Emphasis:

Courtship gives you a preview of marriage reality, not fantasy.

Attributes of Courtship

• Intentional

• Marriage-focused

• Spirit-led decision-making

📌 Key Point:

Courtship begins when marriage is the goal—not just emotions.

4. Purpose of Courtship

Courtship helps you to:

- Evaluate compatibility

- Build trust

- Understand values

- Observe character

- Make informed decisions

📌 Important Statement:

When you marry a person, you marry their background too.

Stages of growth in courtship

Every stage has its own lessons.. These stages may/may not necessarily lead to marriage.

1. The dating stage (AT YOUR MIGHT) - Dating is different from courtship. Courtship is a far more serious and complex stage. However, during courtship we now start to date the one we have chosen. Create emotional attachment and trust.

2. Learning stage (GET SET) - Observation, decisive actions are meant to be taken at this stage. This stage has in it some pretense which may not be seen because of love.

It is a time to study the family dynamics, family background (even spiritual background), the parenting styles, their culture, their priorities, their social status, their temperaments. It is not a time to ACT or REACT... It is a time to get the details so we may build something beautiful.

3. The Transition stage - The stage when everything is set to "GO".... Gunshot!!! You are set to run with it ... Hab 2:2. This stage we are set for marriage or we start over. Usually, most courtship lead to marriage but we must be careful and ready to take responsibilty for our decisions and the future.

PHASES IN A RELATIONSHIP

There are phases in relationships (esp marriage). These phases should be worked out during courtship. 

The phases are:

1. The Past - Like it or not, our parent are our past. They are always going to be there but you would determine their place in your life. 

(Genesis 2:24)

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” . God’s pattern for marriage involves “leaving” parents and “holding fast” to a husband or wife. Thus, marriage brings a change of allegiance. Before marriage, one’s allegiance is to parents; after marriage, allegiance shifts to one’s mate

2. The present: we are the present that will determine what we do with the past and the future. In our present life we make decisions and take good actions. 

The success of any marriage is a function of a good courtship

3. The future: The future is our seed esp children

Someone said, when you lose your parent, you lost your past but when you lose your child, you lost your future. When you lose your spouse (not necessarily to death) the present is shattered.

Note:

Know that the moment you get married, your spouse becomes your immediate family while members of your extended family becomes your relations. It will therefore not be wise to care for your relations at the expense of your immediate family. You should care for both of them, but one takes priority over the other.  Whatever you can make available to your extended family members is a help, however, your immediate family is your direct responsibility. Learn to set your priorities right!

IN-LAWS

Dating is left by and large to the discretion of the teen, whereas courtship has the oversight of the parents, and more specifically the father. It then mean that we must meet our in-laws. Before decisions can be made on how to handle them, we must first know them. We cannot know them fully without asking questions. Successful relationships don't thrive on assumptions.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

In-law may refer to:

• Affinity (law), kinship by marriage, such as:

• Parent-in-law, a mother-in-law or father-in-law

• Sibling-in-law, a sister-in-law or brother-in-law

Things To Know During Courtship (in-laws in perspective)... The topic once again

ASKING TO KNOW & VISITING TO OBSERVE

The Power of Asking Questions

Key Scripture

Matthew 12:34–35

34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.

35 A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things.

→ What is in the heart will eventually be revealed.

Why Questions Matter

• Compatibility Check

• Trust Building

• Communication Development

• Conflict Resolution Insight

• Longevity Testing

• Family & Cultural Awareness

📌 Class Insight:

Silence during courtship can lead to confusion in marriage

6. Core Areas to Examine in Courtship

During courtship, there are questions to ask, thorough systematic observation has to be carried out

IN-LAWS - Questions We Should Ask That May Bring Out Secrets And Details We Need

Few of us have made mistakes during coutship that still haunt us. We didnt ask enough questions, we did not take actions, we did not relate our utmost desires, we simply let our emotions take the front seat and push aside the YELLOW and RED FLAGS.

Few of the questions that may help are listed below

A. Personal & General Life

Ask:

• What are your goals in life?

• What do you do for a living?

• Do you have any addictions?

📌 Focus: Lifestyle & discipline

B. Faith & Spiritual Life

Ask:

• Are you born again?

• What is your walk with God like?

• Do you believe in core Christian doctrines?

📌 Focus: Spiritual alignment

C. i. Family Background

This is our AOC (Area of concentration)

Courtship is a serous stage. Emotions comes second. Before you go to your in-law's house, you ask questions from your spouse about them. Ask carefully and respectfully.

Ask:

1. What is your family structure like?

2. What lessons did you learn from your parents’ marriage?

If you can ink it, you can think it...

Note them down... When you're alone... Join some dots but don't conclude yet...

Marriage is long ooo... Diligence, discipline in courtship is very germaine.

ii. Health

Any answers to these questions is a pointer to the health chemistry of the family.

Ask:

• What is your genotype?

• Any medical conditions?

📌 Focus: Transparency & preparedness

Don't fall blindly in love... Marriage will shine your eyes and it may be too late...

Love birds full everywhere... Do SWAT job for the glorious future you desire

iii. Finances

The perspective of the children on money issue will reveal a little secret about where he/she comes from.

Ask:

• How do you handle money?

• Joint or separate accounts?

• Views on giving and saving?

📌 Focus: Financial wisdom

iv. Marriage & Home Expectations

Ask:

What is your role as a spouse?... Ask respectfully... You may be surprised some don't know their role as a spouse.

Do you want children?

What are your views on divorce?

📌 Focus: Vision alignment

D. Extended Family

Don't forget, ask a smart and respectful manner. When you visit, look out, read the scripts and learn lessons through interactions.

Ask:

• What role will family play in our marriage?

• How do we handle interference?

📌 Focus: Boundaries

I. Children & Parenting

Ask:

• How should children be raised?

• Discipline methods?

Your spouse is your best ally.. before you visit, ask questions from him/her

Be wise as serpent when you  get there...

Not time for action or reaction... It is time to gather information that will determine how you will relate with them...

Except you no wan marry sha

E. PURPOSE OF THESE FINDINGS: 

To get the positives and red flags

VISITATION TIME

It doesn't come always but necessay to do... First impression last very loooonnnnngggg..... Few of them fit dey wait beautiful girl/handsome bobo.... You just have to be yourself but focus on fiance/fiancee also......👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

Red flags in courtship?

• Dishonesty

• Poor communication

• Lack of spiritual alignment

• Disrespect

• Financial irresponsibility

• Unresolved past issues

📌 Strong Warning:

If major values do not align, love alone is not enough.

As I conclude

Courtship is not:

• A game

• A trial-and-error process

It is:

• A purposeful journey

• A decision-making phase

• A foundation for marriage

CONCLUSION

• Ask questions. 

• Observe deeply. 

• Pray sincerely. 

• Decide wisely.

Assignment 

What critical decision(s) did you make during courtship or have taken in courtship that has impacted and still impacting your relationship/marriage positively or negatively?

Let us pray

My Father and our Lord, thank you for your word, please help everyone of us... Both married and those that still building, help us not to miss it... Help me not to miss it Lord, for those who has missed it, Lord help us breathe on it... Wipe away tears, mend broken hearts, connect us divinely in Jesus name I pray. Amen

Month Theme - Intercession Series

Topic - The Hurting Home

Father we thank you because You will hear us again tonight. For those who will not believe, please show your signs and wonders here. Let Your word heal, save and deliver, in the name of Jesus. Amen.

The Holy Spirit set aside what He had inspired me to address today and now, I’ll just flow as He leads.

I recall a story I read somewhere a long time ago. A man was waiting for someone at the airport and seeing the woman they jumped into each other’s arms and were all over themselves. A curious bystander asked, “You both are new couples, right?” They replied, “No, we’ve been married for 18 years.” The bystander was shocked but quickly threw in the next question, “You must have been apart for a very long time, right?” They replied, smilingly, “Well, yeah, for three days.”

A man and woman who start up a home often decide intentionally or unintentionally what the home turns out to be. If it’s pleasant, loving, sweet, warm and full obedience to the Spirit of God despite the challenges and disagreements, then it will be a home its members run to and miss dearly every time they’re away. The opposite is true too to a great extent.

Having a hurting home is such an unpleasant experience. When the house is a place the children want to avoid, it’s not a home, it is hurting and it starts from the man and wife who started the family. 

Some of us are carrying wounds sustained from the houses we were born and raised in and no flicker of improvement there. It has become a dreadful place. 

While some children cannot wait to get married and “leave this place for good,” some are eagerly anticipating their university admission so they can get the hell out of there. 

I pray the Almighty will visit those homes again and still every storm there, in the name of Jesus.

Every home has its challenges. Even those who marry rightly have their share of problems. However, some homes are hurting because at least one of the partners knows that s/he missed it in the choice of the spouse. The result is here and the heart truly regrets this choice. For some, they married rightly but now, they deeply don’t desire each other or the house just feels too lonely.

For some, the house is a war zone and you wonder, when will this change for good? Some homes are hurting because the partner has become “something else.” This is not what you set out to build together. This is not who you imagined him/her to become. This is not what you both talked about. Now, one partner is stuck and hurting and by extension, the home. We are still dealing with the dynamics of the two who founded the home.

If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? Psalms 11:3

Because God said - Yet have I set my king upon my holy hill of Zion (Psalm 2:6), and so, we will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1

And that same God says - Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh: is there any thing too hard for me?" Jeremiah 32:27

Father, we had over these homes to You, please bring a lasting change to them in the name of Jesus. No one is too difficult for you to save. Please, save these homes for Your name’s sake in the name of Jesus.

Some homes are hurting because someone’s heart got broken, some along with their dreams shattered. I pray for you from Psalm 147:3 - He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. Receive healing in your heart in Jesus’ name

Some homes are hurting because they lost someone dear to the cold hands of death. I pray that the Comforter comforts your heart and stablish you in every good word and work, in the name of Jesus. May God fill the void left behind and keep the family steady and strong in Jesus’ name. This is specially for the founder and president of this network @⁨Nihinlola Olowe Myself⁩. Receive fortitude to bear the loss, the heart to set those pricking questions aside and just draw closer to God. Let God heal this deep wound from the loss.

Some homes are hurting because they keep spending on hospital care and the sickness/disease refuses to heal. I speak the word of the Lord - But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed (Isaiah 53:5, KJV). Be healed in the name of Jesus!

Some homes are hurting because they are caught up in legal trouble along with prison experience. Ah! Let help arise for you. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.  Psalm 37:6, in the name of Jesus.

Father, You said in Psalm 50:15 - And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me. We call on You, save these ones that these families may glorify You, in the name of Jesus.

For all the families who are oppressed by some rich or opportunistic folks and pains and tears are their bread daily, let enlargement and deliverance arise for you from this night in the name of Jesus.

For anyone here or who has someone that is emotionally distressed, mentally challenged, those considering disappearing, receive healing, full restoration, total wholeness of spirit, soul and body and strength to win the battles of your mind in the name of Jesus. Remain grounded in the love of God, in the name of Jesus.

And when he had looked round about on them with anger, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts… Mark 3:5, KJV.

For those yet to marry, by all means, please make sure:

- you marry right

- ⁠you improve your character 

- ⁠you don’t have a hard heart i.e. you have a circumcised heart or a heart of flesh that obey the Holy Spirit in everything especially relating with your spouse and building the home.

For those who have unyielding partners, Father, we know You are angry seeing hard hearts, I join my faith with these ones, also because of the pain they are suffering at the hands of their partners who have hard hearts, let Your word that is like hammer hit such hearts. Let Your word that is like double edged sword cut through those hearts. Let their change come quickly. Let streams of joy flow from such homes. Let Your love reign supreme, in the name of Jesus. We enthrone Jesus in our homes. We follow the Holy Spirit as He leads. We transform the nations by the light of Your love emanating from our homes. No matter how old they are, no children from our homes are born for Satan to own. Every home Satan has overtaken, we banish him right now. Let there be full restoration. Let the peace of God which passes all understanding keep our hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. All glory to You Father. In the name of Jesus we pray. Amen.

Please share these sessions with your spouse to be blessed too. Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the word of God. Let them relate with these ministrations firsthand. God bless our homes. Good night @⁨all⁩

One more, for those homes still looking up to God for the fruit of the womb, receive your bundle of joy by the power of the Holy Ghost. According to the time of life, you will come dancing in Jesus’ name

Every home has its challenges but when someone is missing, nothing else compensates for it. 

Have you noticed in this Luke 15 passage that the losses started from outside, then something got lost inside the house and now the home is not complete because a son/daughter went astray? 

People of God, let’s pay attention to the subtle signs around us and stand out guard both in wisdom and prayers because the devil, as a roaring lion, still seeks whom to devour. 

I pray that he will not find a space in our homes and we will not carelessly lose what we own in Jesus’ name.

For every home represented here where a son/daughter is unwillingly missing (by kidnap, etc.), let mercy speak and let grace bring such back home in the name of Jesus. 

Things have gone so bad in terms of insecurity in the land but the power of God is still as potent as ever. Father, show Yourself strong on behalf of these lost ones in the name of Jesus.

Month Theme - Intercession Series

Topic - The Lost Son/Daughter

Text - Luke 15:11-20a

11 - And he said, A certain man had two sons:

12 - And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.

13 - And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

14 - And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want.

15 - And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine.

16 - And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him. 

*17 - And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father's have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger!*

*18 - I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee,*

*19 - And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.*

*20 - And he arose, and came to his father.* KJV

Now, for the ones who willingly left home, if you’re here and:

1. *You took a job that God doesn’t want for you, you’re in a far country.* It doesn’t matter the heavy salary, bonuses and perks of office, you are outside the house. Same goes for those who start up a business that is not God’s will. It doesn’t matter if it’s a godly one and people are successful doing it. In fact, it doesn’t matter if it’s God’s idea which you started when He hasn’t told you it’s time, you’re in a far country. 

Scripture says in Isaiah 30:21 - _"And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left"._ You didn’t hear the Voice and you dash out to fulfill His idea without Him? You are wrong! You’re far away from home. You need to come back home.

2. *Some people are in a relationship (or friendship) that God did not approve, you’re in a far country.* Again, it doesn’t matter the butterflies in your stomach, the trips abroad and promises of marriage or travel abroad, you are in a far country. 

Sadly for some people, they know they are far from this home but because of the shame of what people will say in breaking off that relationship or the fear of not finding someone else or the false sense of the kind of reception that will greet them from their human family when they “return home,” they decided to stay back in that wrong relationship. Some have gotten married there and given birth to children all in that far country. Even the prodigal son was wise enough not to expand outside of the father’s reach. It is time to come back home.

3. *Some have started ministries that God did not tell them. Better go and close them down and return home.* It doesn’t matter if you have the gifts of the Holy Ghost and working all kinds of genuine miracles in the name of God, any plant my Father has not planted will be rooted up, so His word says. 

_"But he answered and said, Every plant, which my heavenly Father hath not planted, shall be rooted up."_ (Matthew 15:13, KJV).

As long as it didn’t start from God, it will not stand no matter how long it flourishes, it will be rooted up. You cannot start a godly work from your human reasoning and expect God to flow along with you; you’re wrong! You are in a far country. Come home.

4. *Some of us are worshipping in churches that God hasn’t sent you there, you are in a far country.* It doesn’t matter the anointing that comes down there or how your prayers have been answered so far. Soon, you will spend all, a famine will arise and you will be in want as we saw happen to the prodigal son. 

For some of us facing adversity, it’s not fasting and deliverance you need, all you need to do is to arise and go back home because the source of your problem is that you have gone into a far country. 

You see, in this Family, we do as the Father wills, not your will or good thinking or how it has always been. No! Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven. It is heaven invading earth not earth overtaking heaven. Any step outside that will is wrong. Can you start retracing your steps now? Please hurry up and go home.

5. *Some sons and daughters are in the house, but they are far from home because they have joined themselves to some bad friends in school or colleagues at work and they are so ingenious in masking it from their parents.* I pray that the Almighty God will have mercy and such sons/daughters will return home in the name of Jesus.

Usually for this part of the series, it is an action step that is needed, and that is, to arise and go home. 

I stand in the gap for every parent who has seen that their son or daughter is not who they trained such to be, has become eyesore to them, a pain in the heart, I pray that the Almighty God will have mercy and bring such child back home in the name of Jesus.

All you need to do is just remain in the gap in place of prayer, patience, and wisdom to handle such children. You can also look inwards to see where you are at fault in raising such children. 

For some of those children, they could have been driven out by the despicable behaviors of their parents. Is it a hostile home? Parents who are disrespectful to themselves? Is it saying things that you don’t practice? Is it anger that spins in the home? Is it infidelity? Loving and preferring one child more than the other? Aggressive and abusive parents? Parents using cursive words on themselves and the children, etc.?

Even if it is a Christian home, is it that the house lacks peace, and the son of daughter finds no home in it, and has decided to find his or her peace somewhere else which in the process has joined himself or herself to people whose values do not align with the scriptures? We are humans, we make mistakes too. So, what part did you play in pushing your son/daughter out? Some parents even encourage their children to do ungodly things just to have money to bail them out of poverty or lack. Where did you go wrong as parents? You also may need to retrace your steps.

6. *Some have rented a house or are living in a place God doesn’t want for them, you are in a far country.* As long as you are not in the House, you are not covered. Disaster is bound to come out there, what will you do then? Why not come back home?

The Father is still waiting with arms wide open to welcome you. It doesn’t matter the mess you have made out of yourself in that relationship, just come as you are. He will wash you clean, dress you in beautiful outfits and adorn you gorgeously. He is not shocked or ashamed to have you back. He will still call you His son/daughter but first you need to come home. There is no amount of prayer that will work if you choose to remain in that far country. Don’t keep Him waiting. Please, come home. That song says:

_I’ve wandered far away from home_

_Lord I’m coming home_

_The path of sin I’ve trod and trod_

_Lord I’m coming home_

Chorus:

_Coming home, coming home_

_Lord I’m coming home_

_Open wide thy arms, oh Lord_

_Lord I’m coming home_.

Father, I pray for anyone here who is far away from home or those here who have someone who has backslidden, in your mercy, please, let Your Spirit convict them to come home. We pray for their restoration. The enemy will not have them. Father, save their souls, in the name of Jesus.

And for us who are planted in Your House, please establish us, keep us fruitful and always pleasing You, in the name of Jesus. Amen. Thank You, Father. Good night.

Good evening, Family. As I prepared for this teaching, it just kept expanding before my eyes which is a direct result of the Holy Spirit at work. What was no more than half a page in draft became a very lengthy series that will now be treated in two (2) parts. To God be the glory. If we are able to take the second part tomorrow, fine, if not, do make use of today’s session.

Month Theme - Intercession Series

The Lost Coin - Part 1

Luke 15

8 - Either what woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one piece, doth not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it?

9 - And when she hath found it, she calleth her friends and her neighbours together, saying, Rejoice with me; for I have found the piece which I had lost. KJV

We talked about the farmer who lost one sheep out of a hundred last week and prayed for us but some people have just one sheep and they lost it, now the house is badly affected because they lost the coin that comes from it. I pray for those in this category who have lost their jobs/businesses and are practically eating from hand to mouth or hiding in shame, Father, arise for them in a miraculous way in the name of Jesus.

The Holy Spirir just interrupted me now saying - “Don’t take this declarations with levity. Don’t say that’s what men of God do, and so you just casually read or move on without treating the issues raised here.” Well, I have delivered to you.

A man came to my office late last year and after attending to his official needs, I had to tell him that there was really no need for him coming and then he broke before me in near whispers. 

He said he lost his job many months before then and his wife made the house hell for him. He said he already explained to her about the issue he came for but she looked at him like a no good saying that he had no job and still not useful on the issue. Ah, it broke me. He shook his head sideways many times. I knew how deep his pain ran, how he covered it and I prayed for him there. 

I pray for those in this category, the Lord is arising for you with pleasant surprise jobs/businesses. Please believe it. May God set you up for a great job/businesses placement in the name of Jesus. Upon this altar of the Holy Spirit I decree, with joy you will draw water out of the wells of salvation again, in Jesus’ name. 

I pray for anyone here whose partners ridicule you because of some loss you are suffering, let God arise for you and prove them wrong in the name of Jesus!

The lost sheep we discussed focused on the herd (outside), today’s topic takes its lesson closer - in the house. 

Tonight, as I intercede for us, I will tell us our assignment before explaining the lesson in the light I received. As you say amen to the prayers, please bear in mind that you will do what this woman in the parable did - whether male or female, you will burn the night lamp in prayers and rigorous study, get your broom in terms of pen and notebook as you sweep through your memory in the following questions:

1. What exactly is lost in this house? The woman knew a coin was lost, not clothe, jewelry, kitchen utensil, food, etc. Get the specific name of what is missing in your house and write in a special/personal note.

2. How many is lost? The woman knew she had 10 total coins and only 1 was lost. Make a list of the missing coins if they’re many. We are not talking about money only.

3. Where did you lose the coin? The woman knew it was lost in the house, not outside. We will explain this later in part 2, God willing and if there is capacity.

4. The end goal must be that you get back the lost coin (or coins), hence, you don’t stop till you find it. As you can see, I didn’t ask how you lost it and how you will get it back. You will get answers as you sweep through 1-3 above with the explanations coming up.

So, what does the coin mean?

*1. Coin is a means of exchange - lost money.* This loss is biting on the family or relationship. How did you lose it? No detailed findings before engaging in the business? As fraud victim? Is it naivety or carelessness? Note them and work on them. 

I pray for you, the Lord will put smiles on your face again and the days of your loss will be replaced with plenty in the name of Jesus.

*2. Coin can mean gift or talent - lost ability.* How did you lose it? Negligence? Immorality? Indiscipline? Lateness? Laziness? Wrong lifestyle you refuse to leave? Mixing lies with deceit? Bad character? Pride?

You can sing, people tell you you have such a nice voice but to practice personally is a no for you. I know someone who is not only very brilliant but also knows how to teach, much more, is very patient in teaching till you get it. Even if you have a blocked head, when he teaches you, you will get it. He won’t mind repeating it multiple times just to see you get it. In fact, many days and weeks later, he will still go over the class work with them. Those days, I knew I didn’t have his patience in teaching, his was too much. 

But I was so sad when he told me that he didn’t like teaching. What? I put the facts witnessed personally before him but he refused to listen. I suggested ways he can make money (as he is unemployed for over 10 years now) but he refused. I asked him to apply for a job somewhere and on the side, do tutorials for students but he gave me a deafening no. Till date, he’s not using the teaching ability. Abilities you don’t put to use become very difficult to exhibit with time, stunting or reversing your growth and the motivation to put them to use fades as you grow. 

In this case, I don’t want to say you lose it but really, it becomes useless. What has become moribund in your house? What coin has become dormant in your life? 

I pray for you, may you have eyes that see them, the courage to get back to work and the resilience to continue putting them to use. May God help you to reverse the regret you remember over matters of your life and your house you handled carelessly. May God help you to recover lost grounds with speed, in the name of Jesus.

*3. Coin as idea or growth - lost opportunity.* How? Via bad manners? Waiting to be served? Unkind? Trivializing good people’s efforts? 

From my story in (2) above, recently, the person I mentioned asked me if that vacancy was still open that he would like to apply. I was red hot angry. Of course, it was long closed but I was angry because a deep pain I couldn’t share with him about myself opened again. I blasted him well. He was sober but it was too late. The opportunity was already lost, something he would’ve got on a string-free executive platter.

What opportunity have you lost in your house. Some of us are so rich that we have lost count of opportunities that could’ve changed our lives greatly and now, we are not proud of where we are in life. I pray for mercy for you. May God have mercy on you. 

With that pain deep in my heart I mentioned above but didn’t explain, I pray God to have mercy on you and show you the way again. 

With all due respect, receive sense to grab opportunities God throws before you in the name of Jesus’ name. Oh, the tears are coming. I knew it. I knew this topic will touch a core part of me.

The Holy Spirit is busy giving you ideas but how many do you believe in anyway? How did you handle the ideas God gave you? Instead of you building quietly, were you not out there running your mouths about it and another person hijacked it and went big on it? I sincerely apologize if that sounds insulting. Is talkativeness not what you need to deal with? Are you too trusting that you end up losing your ideas? It was bad that you were betrayed, that is on them but you drew close to you someone who should be very far. That is your fault to deal with!

You don’t know how to place people in their appropriate level of relationship. Not everyone who strolls past should stand around. Not everyone who stands around should stay back. Not everyone who stays back should stay long. Not everyone who stays long should sleep over. Not everyone who sleeps over should sit close. Not all who sit close should stick closer. Not all who stick closer should see your heart!

Look at your own part in it. Share with people at the level they are supposed to see. Judas was part of the 12, not the 3 and of the close 3, John was the special one who saw the heart of Jesus. He was the only one among the 12 who stood close to Jesus during His gory experience and carried on in his epistles the love Jesus taught and exemplified. 

May God show us mercy. God said, “My people perish for lack of knowledge.” Know where to place people in your life.

There was an idea God gave me 18 years ago. Like they told us back then that we should work on our ideas, otherwise, someone somewhere who got the same thing may run with it and launch it before you do. I didn’t know how to hear God very well back then so I decided to run with it but there were many problems including money and connections to the right set of few people. 

Also, I didn’t know places in Lagos where I could make the connections so I called a good friend of mine who asked his Dad for directions to different places on my printed list from Google but I didn’t tell them what I was going to do. 

This is where I’m going - when we got there and it was time to see the executive we came to meet, I told my friend to stay back while I went in to discuss. I learnt good lessons back then on that idea. Now that I hear God better, I have still not launched that idea and God helping, till date I have not seen the idea anywhere. Even though that my friend was a good person till relocation separated us, still, I am glad I kept the idea. So what idea have you lost being too trusting and sharing with everyone around you?

Let me quickly say that it’s not all ideas you are meant to launch. I didn’t read that statement anywhere. I got it from personal experience. 

Still in 2008, I got a brilliant idea that was too big for me to carry out because it required highly technical expertise in different advanced fields, full time commitment and extremely capital intensive but I was in school studying a course that was polar opposite of that idea. I tried to work on it but couldn’t go further because those I discussed with were so primitive in their thinking despite being in the field of the idea, even the lecturer. Not up to a year later, I began seeing that idea everywhere.

Then I began pondering within me why I got an idea I clearly couldn’t execute. I didn’t get an answer from God at the time but more kept pouring in. Then I understood that God was only stretching my heart. I pray for you, may you have the heart that can receive ideas and multiply them in execution. May your life be a fertile one where ideas thrive and generations are liberated. May the ideas God give you yield 30, 60 and hundred folds in the name of Jesus. We will continue this tomorrow if God wills. 

Thank you. Good night.

We are starting an intercession series tonight which will last for the entire month. It will cut across every aspect of our lives and families, so I implore us all to please find a free time with less or no distractions to follow through meditatively and appropriate the lessons effectively. More so, it’s called intercession, hence, stand in the gap for someone who needs it and see what God will do in your own life too. Thank you.

Month Theme - Intercession Series

Topic - The Lost Sheep

Text - Luke 15:3-6

3 - And he spake this parable unto them, saying,

4 - What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it?

5 - And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing.

6 - And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbours, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost. KJV

This sheep owner Jesus mentioned was a farmer, hence, this relates today to your business or job or investment. In this parable, this owner was doing fine because he had a hundred sheep. None was sick and none was dead. I pray that your business/job/investment will suffer no attack of the enemy in the name of Jesus. The Lord will keep evil away from your herd in Jesus’ name.

This man had grown so much, from one sheep, to two, ten, fifty and hundred. I pray that the Lord will bless you regardless of the state of the country and increase you such that everyone will know this is God at work. 

We shall be like a tree planted by the rivers… and whatsoever you do shall prosper (Psalm 1:3).

Genesis 26

13 - And the man waxed great, and went forward, and grew until he became very great. KJV.

This is your portion, and mine, in Jesus’ name.

But this farmer didn’t arrive at this enviable point just by chance; he definitely put in the work required. This sheep owner was so diligent and meticulous in that he knew he had 100 sheep; he knew the exact number, not a guess or an approximate. 

This could mean different business investments or profiles in your care or what people call different streams of income. It could also mean different aspects of one business that generate an aggregate sum for you as a business owner.

In that line, for a career person, it could mean that you have just one job through which you get your sustenance plus some other things you do on the side through which income can be generated. For instance, as a teacher who also loves to teach, you teach during the regular hours, you do home lesson on different days for different pupils, you may have a car you put to use as “commercial” on your way to work and on other free days. All these are around the same job.

I stand in the gap for you and I pray that God will open our eyes to see opportunities to explore to make wealth, in the name of Jesus. Please, pray this well till you sense a release in your spirit. It can last for months, even years, but tarry on it.

I pray that the blessing of God will hold you and your family together. Before lack comes to put you to shame, help and supply will rise for you, in the name of Jesus.

But in the parable, one sheep was missing. To grow to the level of a hundred sheep is not an easy feat or a stroke of luck. A lot of business tactics, diligence, networking, tough decisions, painful sacrifices, etc. would've gone into it. And so, it is very painful to discover that one is missing. Let me show you an example of pain in words of a similar farmer - Jacob in Genesis 31:38-40.

Genesis 31

38 - This twenty years have I been with thee; thy ewes and thy she goats have not cast their young, and the rams of thy flock have I not eaten.

39 - That which was torn of beasts I brought not unto thee; I bare the loss of it; of my hand didst thou require it, whether stolen by day, or stolen by night.

40 - Thus I was; in the day the drought consumed me, and the frost by night; and my sleep departed from mine eyes.

41 - Thus have I been twenty years in thy house; I served thee fourteen years for thy two daughters, and six years for thy cattle: and thou hast changed my wages ten times.

42 - Except the God of my father, the God of Abraham, and the fear of Isaac, had been with me, surely thou hadst sent me away now empty. God hath seen mine affliction and the labour of my hands, and rebuked thee yesternight. KJV.

Profit and loss abound in business, even life in general, no doubt. This farmer was very detailed such that despite the high number of sheep, he knew one was missing. But what seems startling here is that the sheep was not killed by a wild animal or disease-struck or found dead, no. It just was not found. It was missing. The sheep was lost. The meaning?

As an entrepreneur or an employee, you know you’re doing your best, you are hardworking (or smart working), punctual, with integrity, hold a good working relationship with colleagues and superiors alike at least to a very large extent, you can handle tasks competently, you are innovative (as often as required), you are insightful in your contributions in meetings, you appear to outpace others in understanding and using a new system out in place, etc. and you think what could be missing? Please note these and appraise yourself.

Despite all or most of these, the promotion is missing; the step-increase you don’t get it; when they need someone to head or handle a new team which is an obvious positional shift with higher income or perks of office, you’re overlooked; recognition is not there. Something is missing and this is hurting you.

As an entrepreneur, you try all you can to grow the business but something keeps missing from it. It has become a pattern. Maybe you are just stuck on that level of growth and you know something is missing in your herd. I pray the Almighty will have mercy on us.

Could it be that you lack a particular type of training or skill? A certification? Degree? May be they see you as impatient and decide that if you’re put in that position, you’ll not fit. Is it patience that is missing? Humility? Warmth and cheerfulness? Is it stubbornness or recalcitrance people are seeing while submission and compliance are missing? Is it that as entrepreneur, you don’t listen to anyone? Which area of weakness is in your business? What is needed to complete the flock? Did you reject a candidate in your recruitment who you knew deep within that you should’ve employed? What is lost in your herd? You need to go after it.

I am praying for us from Genesis 21 that:

1. God will hear your voice as you cry out to Him, in the name of Jesus.

2. ⁠God will open our eyes to what to do to get what is lost in our lives and business/job in the name of Jesus.

3. ⁠God will plug you to those with whom you will find fulfillment in your job/business, in purpose and in God, in the name of Jesus.

Genesis 21:

17 - And God heard the voice of the lad; and the angel of God called to Hagar out of heaven, and said unto her, What aileth thee, Hagar? fear not; for God hath heard the voice of the lad where he is.

18 - Arise, lift up the lad, and hold him in thine hand; for I will make him a great nation.

19 - And God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water; and she went, and filled the bottle with water, and gave the lad drink.

As I’m praying for us, please do well to pray these for someone who needs it and also do a honest, objective and critical assessment or job/business life. It is from this assessment that your eyes will be opened to see what you need to work on. And if you don’t need it, please pray them for me as I do.

Finally, I decree, receive supply of strength and resources to go after what is lost; receive speed to overtake; and without fail, receive grace to recover all, in the name of Jesus. Amen. God bless us.

Meet our Guest Speaker:

Mrs Ibiwoye Omolade Christianah, Married with two kids, teacher by profession.

Our Heavenly Father, we thank you for today, thank you for us to see the last day in February, as we gathered to learn at Your feet, teach us by Yourself, for in Jesus mighty name have we prayed.

Today, we will continue the series on compatibility checklists in courtship, and we will look at social circles and habits.

We are going to split our teaching tonight into two parts: social circles and social habits.

Let first look at the social circle in courtship.

Social circle is a person's immediate network of friends, family, colleagues and acquaintances with whom they regularly interact and share a sense of connection.

These networks provide social, emotional and practical support acting as a primary source of validation, shared activities and information.

A healthy social circle in courtship balances shared friendships with individual connections, enhancing support and well-being.

let look at some key aspects of the social circle in courtship

* The two-handed circle:- It is crucial to protect the relationship by keeping it private and not letting outside opinions even from family or friends interfere with the bond between partners

* Shared Friendships:- Building friendship with other couples can strengthen your own providing mentorship, shared and increased joy

* Social compatibility:- Ensure that you are comfortable with your spouse's friends and vice versa, aligning on social life prevents future conflicts.

Tips for managing social circles in courtship.

* Consult your partner:- Always discuss with your partner to ensure mutual understanding and agreement on issues.

*  Prioritise Support:- Surround yourself with friends and families who support your courtship not those who create conflict.

Now we move to the second part of our lesson tonight social habits in courtship.

Social habits are automatic, learner behaviours driven by social expectations such as greeting others, polite conversation, respecting personal space and sharing.

Social habits in courtship are the daily, weekly, or consistent, repeated actions that build, maintain or damage a relationship. These behaviours, ranging from simple courtesies to deep communication routines, cultivate intimacy and friendship, or if neglected, can create distance and tension.

Some social habits include the following

1. Communication. No matter how busy your schedule is try to check on your partner at all times. Thank God for social media. 

2. Undiluted attention. When you are on a date with your partner, there should be no side distractions like pressing your phone, receiving phone calls and the likes, you should give each other 100 per cent attention 

3. Learn to appreciate one another. Even the Bible encourage that we should learn to be appreciative at all times. A simple thank you can make or spoil a relationship.

4. Don't keep offences, learn to forgive each other, even when Jesus Christ was asked in the Bible When should I stop forgiving my brother in a day, Jesus answered and said 70 times 7, which simply tells us that we are to forgive one another.

Unhealthy social habits to avoid

1. Negligence. The I don't care attitude can destroy a courtship

2. Negative speaking about your partner to other people

3. Silent treatment. This is common among my gender,  given a cold attitude to your partner. It can mare a relationship.

I will round up tonight's series with a Bible passage.

Amos Chapter 3 verse 3. Which says can two work together except they agree? There is a question mark at the end of the scripture.

May God help us all